).jpg)
Raised By Her Podcast
Raised By Her is a mother–daughter podcast exploring the lessons, love, and lived experiences passed down through generations. Hosts Ro Nita and Donnica share honest, intergenerational conversations about womanhood, identity, family, and leadership - and the wisdom we inherit (and sometimes challenge).
Part humor and all heart, Raised By Her is a reminder that every generation has something to teach—and that the stories that raise us continue to shape who we become.
Join our email list to stay up to date on the latest: https://stats.sender.net/forms/erkGRk/view
Raised By Her Podcast
Texas Verdict Outrage, Tyra Sues Netflix & Tracy Morgan Backlash
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Unpack the Tyra Banks Netflix lawsuit, the Texas track meet tragedy, and Essence Fest drama. Hard truths on culture and law.
This episode of Raised by Her tackles the heavy intersection of culture, accountability, and the justice system. Donnica and Mom break down the facts behind the Tyra Banks defamation lawsuit against Netflix's America's Next Top Model documentary, and explore the legal fallout of the Essence Festival controversy involving Caroline Wanga. Shifting to urgent social issues, the duo analyzes the devastating Texas track meet tragedy, discussing the fatal consequences of unchecked teen conflict and the racial complexities within the courtroom. The conversation also sounds off on Tracy Morgan's controversial comments about the teaching profession before wrapping up with a heartwarming and necessary look at a Cincinnati mother-daughter conference. It is a deep dive into high-profile court battles, navigating modern parenting dynamics, and the power of authentic communication.
Partner Spotlight: PureMD MedSpa
Ready to look refreshed—not overdone? PureMD MedSpa offers personalized, results-driven treatments using advanced technology designed to smooth, tighten, and enhance your natural look.
Raised By Her listeners receive $100 off their first treatment. To claim your credit, text RAISED100 to 855-978-7363 then book your consultation online at puremdmedspa.com.
TIMESTAMPS:
00:00 The Coffee vs. Week Reality Check
02:44 Facts Over Rumors: Cyrus Case Breakdown
07:42 The Tragic Texas Track Meet Verdict
21:44 How Grief Turns to Racist Outbursts
26:33 Essence Fest Lawsuit & Caroline Wanga
36:54 Why Tyra Banks is Suing Netflix
45:20 Tracy Morgan’s Disrespectful Teacher Rant
50:22 NBA Finals & MSG Security Chaos
55:58 The Mother-Daughter Communication Secret
🎤 New episodes every week. Honest conversations between mother and daughter on family, womanhood, and navigating life across generations.
Speaking, partnerships, and press: raisedbyherpodcast@gmail.com
Join our email list: https://stats.sender.net/forms/erkGRk...
👍 Like, 💬 comment, and 🔔 subscribe to be part of the conversation.
📱 Instagram: / raisedbyherpodcast
📘 Facebook: / raisedbyherpodcast
𝕏 X/Twitter: https://x.com/RaisedByHerPod
📲 Follow us on TikTok: @RaisedByHerPodcast
Thank you so much for joining us on the Raised by Her podcast. It really helps us out. If you download, subscribe, like, and love. And also please leave us a review. Welcome back to Raised by Her. Thank you so much for joining us again this week.
SPEAKER_00We appreciate it. Glad to see you there or have you listening to us. You look so pretty in your yellow. Well, thank you very much. I'm sunshiny. I am sunshiny, but not necessarily blue skies, but it's okay. My no blue skies. Oh, it's been a challenging week, but all is good. Um, a lot of things going on at my house and a lot of repairs, a lot of and it was more challenging for me than I thought in the in the past.
SPEAKER_03Uh, I usually handle these things and just kind of move through it, but it's well, home repairs and and doing various contractors. Uh it's never easy. Maybe you're just remembering it as easy.
SPEAKER_00Maybe maybe so. Maybe so. And a lot of things were happening simultaneously, but you know, it's all good because it's how you look at it. And the blessing of homeownership is this is a part of it. Uh-huh. So good. What about you? How's your week been?
SPEAKER_03It's been really busy. I was actually thinking about this in yoga this morning. Uh-oh. Good for you. I think I'm I'm judging my weeks by how necessary I'm finding caffeine. And so to this was a heavy stated week. It was like I needed to be up and energized and it needed to last through the evenings. I couldn't like just be done uh quickly. And so, um, but it's okay.
SPEAKER_00It's it's I yeah, we made it. We did, we made it. And we had a couple of things that we were working on together this week too, which was uh, I think beneficial to what we're going to be doing in the future, but it also took some time, energy, effort, and some planning on our parts too. So that added to your week.
SPEAKER_03That's true. Yeah. Um, but I'll get that. Look, we try to keep our time beneficial. We do. We kind of move it forward. Yes. So um this is not a legal podcast, but I mean, my goodness in terms of uh all the conversation um on the different lawsuits that are going on uh from last week, which we'll get into in a second, some of the comments, and um then this week with some verdicts coming out, and then even today, I was seeing news articles about some of the things we had talked about in some previous episodes. So we have uh I'm like, now this is not a legal podcast.
SPEAKER_00We're gonna be getting into some people have their opinions, and we actually want to hear what they think because we're giving our opinions as well.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I absolutely um always want to hear that's not true. I do want to hear what people think. Um, but base okay, let's actually just jump right into it. From last week, and we're talking specifically about the Cyrus Carmack Belton verdict out of South Carolina. Uh, we got a ton of comments that that part's amazing. However, I do think that it's important that opinions are rooted in fact. That's true. And I know that there's been a ton of misinformation, disinformation for all types of reasons around that case. Um so actually, let me just jump into uh some of the comments and then we can we can talk a little bit about it. So um we did talk about the fact that Cyrus had a gun on him in the broader episode. However, how um that conversation was clipped, we didn't mention the gun. But also from my perspective, the gun wasn't really relevant because it was in his backpack as he was running away from Mr. Chow, who shot him in the back and killed him. And so we got quite a few comments talking about like, well, well, you didn't mention the gun. I was like, I don't understand how the gun is relevant.
SPEAKER_00I think that the prosecution used the gun being in his um in his backpack or someplace close to his proximity as one of the reasons why the owner of the convenience store had a right to be able to protect himself or protect his son or protect his property or whatever that that reason was. And when we mentioned it last week, what we also talked about was the fact that you have a 14-year-old child that is running away. Yeah. So obviously you are not in danger. Why would you feel the need to go ahead and shoot him? That's the point that we were making last week.
SPEAKER_03Yes, that was the point we were making last week. And I mean, because I saw a lot of comments saying, well, he shot him because the that Cyrus had a gun and he was pointing it at him. And I was like, that's not what happened at all. And they were like, well, he got shot because he stole, he did not steal anything, he did not steal four water bottles. So I just again, um, I just facts, facts are important, facts is important, facts aren't important. Um, we had some people uh really just kind of agree with us as well and just say that it's a really sad situation and they feel really sorry for the family. Some other folks dove into the fact that they really wish that Mr. Chow's broader legal background and the fact that he had been involved in other shootings, and this isn't the first time he shot at customers or potential customers, had been considered.
SPEAKER_00That was not a part uh or allowed to be a part of the evidence within the case from what we read uh concerning that. I do believe that backgrounds are are relevant. I believe that when you start talking about a person's personality or po persona, that that's important uh as well. What really I I believe we're hearing, Donica, is that race in this case played into this particular case.
SPEAKER_03Race plays into everything, as we discussed in the United States. Usually race plays into everything.
SPEAKER_00Race plays into everything uh today, race has played into everything yesterday, and unfortunately, especially in our legal justice system, it has become not only an area where we are not feeling, we as a a race of people, we as a culture, not feeling represented at all on an ongoing basis. And I I a lot of the references, a lot of the comments had to do with the fact of um Mr. Chow being Asian and the the young uh boy who was shot being black. And I thought yes, but you don't the facts are the facts. Facts are the facts.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Um I can't even get into all the comments based on the sheer volume, but we appreciate um all the comments except for the racist ones. Uh and uh a lot of a lot of I think the engagement is coming from folks trying to figure out what truly happened. So my main feedback uh on the comments is just uh look look to the facts of the case and don't don't just listen to a TikTok or an Instagram clip. Um, you can go get a quick case summary um online and then comment.
SPEAKER_00You also can take some time if um if you choose to delve into not just one of our shorts or one of our clips, but maybe tune into the podcast and take a little bit of time to have the more in-depth uh listening for what we what we do, what we talked about.
SPEAKER_03What we actually say that might be to do that contacts help. Yes. Um, and there are timestamps in the description. So you have to listen to the whole podcast.
SPEAKER_00So but there's another case that that's in the news today that is um equally as volatile, if not more so. And it has to do with um what's going on in Dallas, Texas, and um Carmelo Anthony, another young man whose life has been changed dramatically.
SPEAKER_03So on April 2nd of last year, Austin Metcalfe, a 17-year-old student at Memorial High School, um, was murdered by Carmelo Anthony, a centennial high school student of the same age while attack while attending a school track meet in Fresco, Texas. And Anthony stabbed Metcalfe after an altercation, and Metcalf died of his injuries. So there's been several discussions around this case. Um, there's no dispute that Anthony stabbed Metcalfe. Um, but the central legal question is whether that stabbing was murder or self-defense. Okay. And uh what the defense was saying is that Anthony was feeling threatened because he was five feet tall and 11 inches, weighing approximately 162 pounds, whereas Metcalf is six feet tall and weighed 200 pounds. And so uh the there's been a lot of conversation around the judge. We'll get into him in a second. Um, and also the defense team that the Anthony family hired in terms of their strategy and that they leaned too much into the size difference, and that there were other pieces of context that should have been considered beyond just the size difference.
SPEAKER_00In my reading of the case and taking a look at just the dynamics of what was going on, you have two young men, two athletes, and you have a situation where they're just not getting along. My understanding was that uh Anthony was seated in the tent where uh Metcalfe's uh school was, and it was raining outside, and and they started some conversation and then altercation and then disagreement. And there were a lot of witnesses around. But there was some bullying going on in the midst of that circumstance as well.
SPEAKER_03Well, Anthony was asked to leave several times. Um overwhelmingly, the witnesses um did say that Anthony was the aggressor.
SPEAKER_00Um and in terms of him saying it's my right to sit here, or I want to sit here or I want to be here. Um he's in their place. I mean, you know, he was in Yeah, he was in their tent. He was in their tent.
SPEAKER_03So one of the questions is why didn't he just get up and leave? Yeah. Right. Particularly after being asked multiple times um to leave. One of the real issues I think that made this a national story is the fact that he was convicted um and sentenced to 35 years in prison by an all-white jury.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so here we go again with race. Here we go again with race. And um what does the law say in the midst of this? First degree murder? Isn't that premeditated when you're when it's first degree?
SPEAKER_03Well, I so I think you talk to any lawyer, not even just a trial lawyer, any lawyer, and they will tell you that trials are won and lost in Bourdeer in their jury selection.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_03And so the fact that there were three potential black jurors, um, each of them were dismissed by the prosecution. Okay. And the judge allowed it. Now, his defense team did uh do what's called a Batson challenge, and it's a legal um objection, arguing that the state uh is improper and excluding jurors based on race. And that will actually be one of the bases for the appeal. And the family's already filed an appeal um on this case. But um yeah, the optics aren't great, but beyond the optics, I mean, there are several things based on what the judge said afterwards. Judge probably shouldn't be saying anything at all, but he was like, look, I he didn't allow any media, and he was really proud of the fact that he had pushed this case to happen super fast. And he required the jury to deliberate over the weekend, and uh he was talking about how the how he just he wanted the case to be over with so everyone could just move on.
SPEAKER_00Okay, but the jury only deliberated for three hours. That's right. And so the case actually went on for several days in terms of the testimonies, and and so that disturbs me that the all-white jury only deliberated for three hours. I I want to have a broader discussion about the the young men and how this impacts their lives. But is there anything else based upon the legal side? Since uh having gone to law school, you are a person who has, I think, a perspective in in terms of how they might have been able to handle this in in terms of the defense a little bit differently.
SPEAKER_03Um the family has since fired uh their the legal team. And a part, a part of the challenge that they flag is the fact that this is all really expensive. Okay, right? Like hiring defense teams, hiring legal teams, it's all extremely expensive. And so the family had gone out and raised over $600,000 for the legal defense. And they said that uh that didn't even cover everything that was necessary in pretrial. And so in pretrial. That's right. Oh, wow. So that's as a part of their appeal, they are also uh filing for um the fact that they need like financial assistance to to continue to deal with this. And um and listening to the parents who who obviously are are devastated and deep in grief, and this has been a lot. I don't know that they had great counsel and even like who to choose for their their legal defense. Um, they had had um some people tell them that like they should keep this out of the media, like this is a local issue. Oh, it's not a local issue. No, no, it was not they had had some advice.
SPEAKER_00Social media is really what I think uh helped the knowledge and information about what was going on, because I'm not sure I would have known about it if it hadn't popped up and uh and then the um mainline media picked it up and it became a national news story. But social media, I think, is is the uh the place where we began to to hear about what was going on.
SPEAKER_03Well, the judge didn't just bar anything around social media, he b he barred media, period. Okay. Okay. And uh so I I just I feel for the family because I don't know that they had anybody around them. And actually, some people are like, we really wish that they would have hired perhaps a black attorney or a black firm. I don't think that that should be a differentiate differentiating uh decision. It should be a factor though, because even in the all the witnesses that were called, a majority of them were for the prosecution. And so the overall yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Huh. I read that both young men were um planning on going to college and both of them were uh good students, and that you ruin two lives. And I also heard on another podcast the fact that we as adults have been the ones who really have failed these young men in terms of not uh teaching them how to handle a conflict. So now you have two lives ruined forever, one life lost, and and then ruined forever. I you're absolutely right. And yes, the family would the families would be devastated, but but also what is the lesson here for for black people, we see these kinds of situations in terms of the legal system and what we can afford, what we can't afford, just because, but anyone would not be able to afford those kinds of dollars that you were talking about for uh their own defense.
SPEAKER_03This is why one should avoid being a part of the justice system in that way. Go be an attorney, you know, uh, or go go be a judge. Um definitely vote locally for your local judges and everything. But yeah, it it's messy when and it's expensive if um, you know, you get involved in that in that way. He he um Anthony he stabbed him once and it wasn't very uh deep, but it did hit his heart, and so that's why it was just a a kind of a freak accident that was just so yeah, and it's um I do want to say, because we're talking a lot about the assailant, um, that I do really feel for the family that lost their son. And I just wanted to read what his twin brother, he was a twin.
SPEAKER_00Uh oh.
SPEAKER_03Um, what his twin brother said um in his post-sentencing impact statement. Um in choking back tears, he said, You took a son, a brother, a friend, and my best friend from this world. You took someone from me who was supposed to be an uncle, a godfather to my kids. Um, now I want everything taken from you. But he was there. He was trying to plug the wound as his brother uh, you know, lay, lay dying. Um, so I just wanted to kind of humanize the victim because we are talking quite a bit about the the assailant. And I wanted to to do that before I dig too deep into what the father has said after the gag order that the judge ordered.
SPEAKER_00Um well, to the point that you just made, uh, one of the statements that I read in one of the newspaper articles talked about the fact that what we find ourselves so often doing is trying to give mercy to the guilty. And it becomes really cruel to the innocent in terms of the um the person who was harmed. But I think in this case, uh again, no one deserves to have their life taken for any situation like that. And we have to teach our young people how to walk away. We have to teach our young people how to handle conflict. Yes. I I just remember having many conversations with you about when somebody is approaching you, what is it that you are supposed to do? When someone is doing something and you feel like they are violating your space, what are you supposed to do? How you go about handling that? You have to be able to move away from the circumstance and either if you're young, let an adult handle it.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That's what a that's what a parent or a teacher or you had the coaches around. I mean, there's just so many ways, and we're talking about it after the fact. And it certainly was a moment in time that the young man reacted, which we all do when we're upset. We all do emotionally. And the the race factor is a a part of this, but more importantly, I think the human factor of how you be how you handle these kind of situations have to be taken into consideration. So my request is take this as a lesson of talking to your kids, uh young, uh old, about how you're handling conflict because we have guns everywhere, we have knives everywhere. We were talking, uh, I was talking to a friend of mine, and we were talking about the fact that we remember seeing the fights that were gonna take place after the school after you know, he said, she said, he said, he said, he's you know what they're gonna do, they're gonna handle it on the playground after school. But we never thought about having knives and guns. The world today, they want to handle it in a way that is extreme, and then it haunts you forever.
SPEAKER_03Haunts you forever. The um I obviously I'm feeling for everyone involved, but listening to Anthony's mother talk about how she found out. Oh so they were at the track meet, and uh she was like, Anthony communicated with me, so he lets me know, like, you know, where he is, where he's going. And so um the meet ends and the buses come back to the school, and she hasn't heard anything. Um, no phone call, no anything, and she receives an email notifying them that the buses are back at the school. They have um that life 360. Um, and she so she looked it up and she saw that her son was not on the bus that had gone back to school, that he was still at the place that had track meet. And so she went over to the school um and then they took her um over there, and that's how she found out. She was like, I didn't receive a phone call there, you know, I just I had no idea. I knew something was wrong. Um, but you know, and she was just like, I just couldn't have him.
SPEAKER_00I would imagine for the Metcalf's parents um as well that it's your your worst nightmare.
SPEAKER_03Speaking of Metcalf's parents, and then perhaps we can move on from this depicting story. Uh so his father, Austin's father, Jeff, and again, I know that he is deal he's angry, among other things. And Delian Greece. Camilla, whose father was this? Awfameka, the victim. The victims. He went on a podcast and openly used racial stereotypes and slurs directed at Carmelo Anthony, his family, and black culture. Specifically, he said that Anthony is a watermelon felon and that you don't even know who your daddy is because 78% of you don't have your fathers in your homes anymore. You got baby mamas running around with eight kids so they can get EBT cards to feed you all. So he went off, but it was all racial stereotypes. It's inaccurate, by the way, in terms of what he said. But I can't even imagine the anger and the grief. Anger and the grief is no excuse for racism.
SPEAKER_00I wasn't prepared for that. Um I think ultimately what people would say who's on his side, they'll give him a pass because they'll say he was just a grieving father, he was angry, he didn't know what he was saying. All of these kind of comments are the way that people feel. But our society today has been tolerating that kind of um race since racism, uh more so uh in this moment in time, publicly, than we've ever seen before. There's a people are getting passes and allowed to be able to say what's on their mind. How many times in life have you wanted to say something to someone and you have to stop and you have to say, I'm not gonna say that because one, it's not gonna help the situation, right? And two, I think it, but I'm not going to say it because it is not going to solve the problem. All of these racist comments, they're not gonna bring his son back. That's true. And I'm wondering now, what kind of lessons was he teaching his son?
SPEAKER_03And by the way, uh, those statements can now be used as part of the appeal, because uh, in terms of the legal process, it can be used as context why the fact that they had an all-white jury in that town in Texas was even more problematic.
SPEAKER_00And maybe one of the reasons why his son was taunting um Camille Anthony, anyway, maybe. No, you don't know. It's speculation. So all right, I do want to move on because this is hard for us. I know and uh our our our goal here is is always to be able to make sure you have knowledge, you have information, give you some historical context, but also to try to move things forward so your life and to the lives of your family members, the people you love, can be part of the best life. And if you don't talk to your children and teach them these life lessons, how you handle conflict, teach them lessons about how to be able to walk away from altercations because you never know what they have. It's it's road rage is out there. And and so I remember someone saying to me that if somebody just taps your car and you look in the rearview mirror and you see someone getting out, or you sing you you see someone approaching you and you know it was just a tap, just move on. Oh your car is fine.
SPEAKER_03Do not let temporary circumstances become permanent repercussions.
SPEAKER_00There it is. Thank you. Well staged. Shout out to our sponsor, Pure MD MedSpa, the premier MedSpa in the Midwest.
SPEAKER_03They specialize in results-driven treatments like neurotoxin, microneedling, and regenerative boosters, all designed to smooth, tighten, and bring your skin back to life.
SPEAKER_00And they don't just focus on the face, they also focus on one of the most overlooked areas, that is the neck.
SPEAKER_03With advanced options like laser and Morpheus 8, they're helping clients see real, noticeable results.
SPEAKER_00So if you're working on body goals, their body contouring package currently has up to $800 off.
SPEAKER_03Plus, they now offer personalized GLP1 and microdosing programs for a smarter, more sustainable approach to weight loss. No pressure, no overdone results, just natural looking confidence. Raised by her listeners, get $100 off their first treatment. Just text RAISE 100 to 855-978-7363.
SPEAKER_00That's RAISED 100-855-978-7363.
SPEAKER_03Sticking with the legal still vote a bit in court. My goodness. Former Essence Ventures CEO Caroline Wenga filed a defamation lawsuit against Essence Ventures and his parent company in New York. The lawsuit stems from public backlash over the problematic Essence Festival last year. Wenga claimed she was unfairly used as a scapegoat for the events failures. So are you have you been familiar with um Caroline Wenga? Has that No, that has not popped up and I'm not familiar with it. I um I had heard her name, obviously, but then I I ran into her briefly and and and enjoyed the conversation I had with her at a conference several years ago. So it was a corporate conference. And one of uh the the big pieces I remember from her talk was that she was she was talking about um the importance of authenticity in the workplace, and that if where you are is not suiting you, don't change who you are as a person, change where you are. So really was advocating for changing uh a work environment if you were finding it hostile to you. A little bit of background on her, uh, just so you have the context. Uh, she was an executive at Target, she's a corporate strategist, and she's known for championing organizational authenticity. She is uh uh her family immigrated from Kenya and she became a mother at 17, eventually dropping, initially dropping out of college to raise her daughter, but then became an HBCU graduate and later received honorary doctorates. She spent 15 years climbing the corporate ladder at Target. She went in as entry level and became ultimately the chief culture, diversity and inclusion officer before she went over to Essence.
SPEAKER_00Okay. That's an impressive background. She's also the fact that she left school and then had to go through real life situations. She's gone through back and pursuing um not only her education, but also a career that is highly um competitive.
SPEAKER_03You know who she would remind? Well, she reminds me of Bozeman St. John. Oh. In terms of the way that she kind of dresses and presents. I mean, she navigates her in her her space. She is in her space and her place apologetic.
SPEAKER_00Well, and and that's an important place to be, especially this day um in age when we um have the need to have our our authentic selves. Yeah. So I'm I'm pleased with that kind of representation. The broader world, the broader um, I I think dialogue here becomes is the rest of the world ready for us when we are completely and totally on the world. Is the world ready for black women and their truth? And well, black women or Asian women or Indian women. I mean, you know, all kinds of cultures. We are really mixed in terms of who we are and what we are today, more so than than ever before.
SPEAKER_03So uh the core of her allegations is that uh she's saying that Essence put all of the event failures from last year, not all of them, but many of them on her. So she had no festival involvement. She was on extended medical leave during that time. Um, but that Essence refused to clarify that she wasn't a part of um the failures from last year and that they delayed some public announcements around her until um the until after the festival. And as a result of these things, um she suffered damages, she suffered doubts over her merit.
SPEAKER_00Um, and she uh she filed the lawsuit, I guess, based upon the fact that she was suffering mentally in terms of her own uh worth and value, and that it was difficult to be able to separate then those things that she was supposed to do. This is more of a question from what she was responsible for. I'm not quite sure of what you're saying that she was uh charging here.
SPEAKER_03She's charging that the fact that she was the perception was that she was still tied to the festival resulted in a loss in revenue, loss in revenue for personally. She had to fire employees. Okay. Um, a consulting firm that she runs had zero profit one year um after this occurred. And so um, yeah, she's she's alleging harm based on.
SPEAKER_00Um the the harm that they're saying occurred is based upon what she did not do, what her firm did not do. And was the Essence Festival last year considered a complete and total we'll we'll use that word disaster because of attendance, because of uh lack of revenue, because of lack of sponsorship?
SPEAKER_03What was the some of the controversies around the festival last year? Uh was that it was still very tied to Target, which was going through the boycott, which we've talked about on past episodes. Um, several of the concerts and acts started very, very late, hours late. So people were hearing mad. Yeah. You might remember the conversation around Lauren Hill. Yes. Um then also this is actually, we can talk about our our association, our thoughts, and and if we've attended in our and our experiences at Essence Fest at any particular time. But it the festival came under heavy scrutiny last year because they said it wasn't as focused on the black African American experience as it should have been, that it was focusing more on the pan-African or African experience. And so people were not feeling represented. And like I said, she is um Caroline is uh a um her family immigrated from Kenya. So, you know, they were tying that all together where she was like, I wasn't even in it. What are you, you know?
SPEAKER_00So, essence, I'm I'm making sure that I understand this. They blamed her for that which didn't happen and the criticism they received, and then she became um having her own mental challenges and her own business challenges. And so they're in a fight about whose fault is it? Um what's the bottom line?
SPEAKER_03No, no, no. Um Essence isn't blaming her. She is saying that they didn't clarify the fact that she wasn't involved in their lack of and yeah, their lack of clarification is why she suffered harm. How do you feel about this? Well, you know, the US is one of the most litigious, the most not one of the most, the most litigious country in the world. In the world. In the world. Um I I stand for any individual actually, that's not true, I can't even say that. I want to see how it plays out. Uh Essence has said this is not true at all, and they're going to fight it in court. So it will, in fact, play out um in a certain type of way.
SPEAKER_00I think personally, because I've put on festivals and had sponsorships, and it's not any one person, it's not anyone. Yeah, but then whose fault is it if everyone but as we talked about last week, we think leadership matters, and we think that it's very important for everything to be clearly stated. And when you have a legal contract that talks about what you're supposed to do, what you're responsible for, that should stand in terms of whose responsibility it is. But uh, you can't blame any one person based upon everything that that occurred. For instance, when the Lauren Hill concert was delayed, you have to go all the way back to the production people, and there are just so many elements. We also have to talk about the um the idea of what people were expecting, and then how that impacted, I think, the advertisers and and sponsors. So, yeah, we'll see how it plays out, but I think ultimately I I might have some questions about just pointing the finger at one person.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, essence is the Essence Sensible is getting ready to to happen again this year within the next few weeks. And uh I had no desire to go. And I'm trying to think, I've I've gotten a few impatiences over the years to go, but because I wasn't sure about what my experience was going to be, as we've talked about in this podcast, I'm just very particular about how I like to spend my really time, um, I want to do what I can to ensure that I'm having a positive experience. And I just haven't felt that sense of security over the past couple of years with Essence. And so I do hope that they find their footing moving forward and that it can go back to the Essence Festival that it used to be. That was highlighted in in movies like Girls Trip. And, you know, there's such a there's such a history and a moment in culture that Essence represents, not just from the festival, but from the media brand and the media. I mean, there's just so much there that I hope that they're able to pull it together.
SPEAKER_00The brand is strong. The need for this kind of celebration for womanhood, for black womanhood is necessary. And it's a it is a powerful message when you have this many people together coming together to celebrate and to have fun, just basic fun. But I'm telling you, it's not a good look to have the past CEO because no, no, not so that doesn't help your brand at all. No, no, no, no, no. It's it's many times, at least in in terms of uh advising how you communicate the message and what the public relations is for the future. You own up to your stuff. You know, we say that you you have to do what it is that you know to do, but also let's be authentic and let's be real about where the problems are and then how you're gonna solve it, so that your general public will come back and rally around you. The folks are excited, yeah.
SPEAKER_03One more legal case, then we're gonna move on to something else. Please, please. Like hey, please out of the court, I guess. Um, I'm trying, but actually, this just popped up today, and we did a whole episode on the documentary, the Netflix documentary series Reality Check Inside America's Next Top Model. All right. And so today. Okay. And you know, today I haven't been here. Today I've I've been really busy. You haven't been busy today. Okay. So I'll let me bring up speeds. Oh, okay. All right. So Tyra Banks filed a defamation lawsuit against Netflix over her portrayal in that documentary. Oh. We had several paintings about that. We did. We did. She is alleging that Netflix and its producers used selective editing, deliberate omission, and surgical manipulation to create a false and highly damaging narrative about her character. Boy, that's really legalese.
SPEAKER_00Listen to that.
SPEAKER_03Great. In case you want to know how they really felt. Yes, really, yeah, yes, yes. Okay. Which actually to me, I was like, okay. So she she saw some problems with it. Because I mean, one of our takeaways was that we were like, why would she do it? Like, what is going on? Yes, this is not going to help her, and whatever it is she did.
SPEAKER_00We had a lot of questions about the way that she appeared or she came across and her actions, reactions. So she's saying that that was editing.
SPEAKER_03That was she's saying it was editing. She said that she interviewed with them extensively for three and a half hours, and they only included 16 minutes of her interview.
SPEAKER_00Okay. I I'm not so um concerned about the amount of time that they showed in the interview. I would be concerned about the image because we were questioning why she would say some of the things that she said in reaction to the moments that they were showing, moments that were in real time when the series was airing. So I'm gonna have to go back and uh look at this again so that when we find out what the results of this case is going to be.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, well, she's saying that um the how she was portrayed was because everything was stripped of context and that they omitted accountability. And so that she did, in fact, during that three and a half hour interview, take personal responsibility for some of the past controversies, and those were totally edited out. Okay. For example, I'll give you two of what she mentioned: um, the Shandy sexual assault um allegation, which floored people in terms of how she was portrayed, in terms of her reaction or non-reaction. Yeah, my reaction. Yeah, I mean, it yeah, she was not portrayed great. And so she's saying that that reaction uh was manipulated and that she um was okay. Now this I'm a little like iffy on, that she was unaware that Shandy now classifies the on-camera incident as sexual assault. Now I'm going back to the part of the documentary where this wasn't the first time Tyra had heard about this. She had Shandy on her show when she had the Tyra Banks show. Yes. And Shandy was very clear about what had happened to her and the fact that she didn't want to see it again. Tyra played it in front of her.
SPEAKER_00I mean, it's so I'm yes, a little questioning um the not only the memory lapses or what we'll say selective memory, but also how you're portraying it. Now, again, I'm wondering what would be the need for Tyra Banks to put this out there again? There was a lot of reaction during the time that the Netflix um documentary came out. Lots of reactions from the models and a lot of reaction from the judges. And so why is she bringing this up again? Has it harmed her? Has it damaged her in some way that she now wants to be able to uh to correct?
SPEAKER_03I think, yeah, I mean, you can't bring a lawsuit without proving harm. So she's absolutely alleging some harm. Here's another she had, I'm sure that I mean like we just talked about it. She's had backlash. So she's this she's trying to clean up her image. I see. Um, but again, like the other the other piece of this, she was saying that uh the documentary risk misrepresented her friendship with Miss J, and that it inaccurately portrayed that she had cut contact with him after his stroke. And uh, wait a minute.
SPEAKER_00I saw Miss J on several other shows following the Netflix documentary, uh-huh, and he absolutely said that there had not been contact, uh, had not been engagement. At all when he was going through his health challenge. I mean, he made those uh those statements.
SPEAKER_03So correct. And I to me, like, I don't he has no reason not to tell the truth. Why would he? She has a reason not to tell the truth now trying to clean up her image.
SPEAKER_00I will say that what he did say was that you know, I love her forever and you know, she's still in my heart and all that. But he talked about who did come to see him, who reached out to him, who embraced him. So, okay. You know what? Me, you just get kind of don't you really get tired of of some of these situations? And I I understand that these are national personalities and this is a brand that makes money or doesn't make money, depending upon the reputation.
SPEAKER_03But uh I mean if she was in fact done wrong, you know, she has every every right to to uh you know file the lawsuit and and take it from there. And so I'm very curious to see how this is going to play out as well.
SPEAKER_00If I was an exec an executive at Netflix, yeah, what I would do is I would pull all the America's next top model down. No. Well, that might be one one thing because people will start looking at it very and reviewing again. No, I think I would take that three and a half hour interview that we had with Iris, and I would well, I would make it some kind of of of um special or documentary or say you all can see it right here, so then draw your own conclusions. I'm I'm sure the courts will do that, but that's what I think I would do. Well, maybe because that would stop yeah, well yeah, I mean we'll we'll see, but that's a really good point. I mean, if it's in fact, you know you know why I would do that? Because I would be tired of people saying editing is uh everything and and image, you know, imaging has my my image has been uh disrupted or AI did it. I don't give a at this day and age, yeah, it makes it difficult. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that that she's feeling like that and having to go through this.
SPEAKER_03Um, me too. I am also glad though that she looked at that documentary and saw the problems there. And was like, oh no, that that's not how I truly felt. And I want to try to show something different.
SPEAKER_00Because if she looked at that documentary and was like, Well, yeah, you know, it is what it is, then you know that Well, we were we were very surprised and disappointed. in how she came across because we're Tyra Banks fans. We want her to we want her to do it.
SPEAKER_03Okay. It's lawsuit played out, but okay. All right. We we made it through all the legal cases this week. Okay. Mercy. Okay.
SPEAKER_00So for those who are listening and those who are watching, we want you to know it's not a legal show. Is that but we we really want to be up to date on on what is going on.
SPEAKER_03We want to be up to date. We want people to also um know what's going on. We were in a conversation earlier this week um with a person who was like, you know, I love listening to you all's show and this is actually how I find out what's happening in black cultures. Yeah I'm I'm learning something about what's going on. But it's helpful for me to know this, you know, based on the nature of my my role. And so um you know we we just want folks to know.
SPEAKER_00Right. We embrace the truth and we embrace the idea of being able to discuss it and have some knowledge of what it is going on in many cultures, but particularly for us.
SPEAKER_03And also we want to know what other people think and give them a chance to engage in dialogue um with us and you know they still do it in the comments too. There's a lot of stuff out there. So yes there's a lot of stuff out there. Oh yes. Moving past the legal cases of this week did you see what Tracy Morgan said? It hurt my heart. He was recently on an episode of Variety's Actors on Actors and he made some derogatory comments about teachers. Now we stand for teachers on this podcast. We talked about the importance of education and the role teachers play. And so he said that he can't stand teachers and he believes that they have a ceiling and a limit to what they can achieve. And then he said teachers are still making minimum wage and so he mocked the income of teachers. And then lastly he said that teaching is all they're ever going to be and contrasted that with his own parenting style of telling his kids that the sky is the limit. Was he drunk? No drunk he was not drunk and he also has remained silent and has not issued an apology or clarification as of this recording based on the backlash that he's that he's gotten from those uh comments I'm imagining that his agents and his publicists will not be able to walk this back completely and totally because they be able to well no but I because not only were his comments inaccurate and inappropriate but insulting that was my reaction um so insulting to the teaching profession but also he's only where he is because there have been people who have taught him and poured into him from day one.
SPEAKER_00So the fact that you are sitting here now thinking that you have gotten big and bad and bold that you can diss teachers is just unacceptable and inappropriate.
SPEAKER_03Yes, it is I mean teachers are the foundation of our education and his education as well people are wondering if he had a traumatic experience with a teacher that just kind of set him on this course of generalizing because I don't know how you can take one negative experience with a teacher and then try to generalize across the whole profession. And also he I look Tracy Morgan's a character. And so if he was told that he needed to be quiet and stop being disruptive and I mean I get it like because it's the classroom is not about you sir this isn't even as a child like it's not about it's about the whole class and the class learning and moving forward. And so people are wondering like where is that coming from yes yeah it's extreme.
SPEAKER_00It's that was extreme that it really extreme not only was it offensive and rude it was extreme. Yeah so um you're thinking that maybe they tried to shut him down and that's what he's taking forward because the things that happened in our childhood are very relevant and present in our todayhood. So um that's been proven time and time again. So that's a that's an interesting point. Yeah people are trying to there's people are speculating because they're like what yeah why the the problem with his generalities here in terms of teachers teaching profession, the money that people teachers make, all of that is is tied to a system that is not respectful of how you are able to move forward in your life how you're able to grow how you are able to be successful in your profession in general. So the fact that one man who has the stage if you will even thinks that he has the right to just take a whole profession of individuals and to to be able to say those things um is just very disturbing.
SPEAKER_03That's why I ask you if he was on something or if he got specific to something I won't think of that button yeah and if look we love you teachers too we love you teachers yes and we think the teaching profession is here to stay the education system right is here to stay and but there are real challenges um you know the national teachers shortage um the various classroom crises that are going on if you in fact have a grievance against the system be a part of the change and be a part of the solution and moving it forward.
SPEAKER_00That's absolutely right and and really that's why there is the need today to speak out for those professions that we know that the individuals are underpaid. Yeah and make sure that you are trying to help solve the problems. I I certainly appreciate the fact that there are people fighting for the rights of teachers they're people who are really putting their lives at at risk in a sense in in schools and and everything to be able to help young people they're the ones your kids spend the most time with that's yes yes they are all right sir count this as a part of your backlash how about that yes that's true shame on you shame on you Tracy let's talk about your basketball oh basketball in the NBA uh at the time that we are taping this podcast we are waiting for the next game and and the Knicks are up three to one and I I have to clear my throat because this last game oh my goodness I just knew my Spurs were gonna win we were up like 29 points at one moment in time but it didn't happen we lost by one point. We've lost two games in the finals by one point. So uh you already know that I I wasn't watching although I did wake up and and hear about how amazing of a game it was it was and I want excuse me before you you have your point I really have to give it to the New York Knicks uh even though I'm rooting for the Spurs which people keep asking me why are you rooting for the Spurs and they were surrounded by Knicks I am I am surrounded by Knicks fans but but um I am I continue to root for the Spurs because not only because of um Victor Wimpy Wimpey I'll just say that um from France uh a fine young man and a great athlete but they're a whole team of young athletes young athletes who have presented themselves with outstanding skills and who have been able to play on this national stage in a way that has absolutely been amazing. So whoever wins the series and I I truly believe that the New York Knicks um have the wherewithal because I said last week they are the um they're the old school they play old school basketball elders I call them the OG's yeah yeah that that that's true and um they um Brunson has just been outstanding and the team as a whole they deserve to win the um the championship now I'm not saying the Spurs don't deserve it but I I really have to say that um it's been some outstanding basketball I don't even know how I could be any better except if the Spurs have won but I hope but tonight we will see people are saying that New York is going to take it all but by the time this pri podcast airs we'll know or we'll be very close to knowing who the NBA champions um are.
SPEAKER_03Well as I said I think I'm glad you're entertained. Thank you so many people I mean it's not just you not just me no it depends it's this remained on my radar because um James Dolan invited President Trump to the number yes the owner yes and Trump was booed owner of leads yes he fell asleep um allegedly but I was like but I saw the video so I feel like I have to say but yeah we were like he wasn't asleep I was like but I'm literally watching maybe he was just taking he he was resting his eyes for a moment the one of the problems there were there were several with him being there move that right along um is that this was a big moment and a big game for the Knicks but also the city of New York. I mean I talked to my friends in New York City and they were like the city's on fire we are so excited and it's been such a long time since you've seen the city be able to come together like this as a result of Trump this uh saying yes to that invitation they were canceled watch parties security gridlock it hurt local businesses because you know when you have that amount of people coming around the stadium they did I mean it was just disruptive it changed the dynamics of the celebrations that had been planned and it changed the dynamics of how the city would be responding even while the game was going on.
SPEAKER_00So and what was the need?
SPEAKER_03And he fell asleep.
SPEAKER_00Well I know that Andy I know that have you ever been to an event in Madison Square Garden?
SPEAKER_03Yes I went to a boxing match so and watched like through my because I was like that's so violent.
SPEAKER_00I know it was I was I was there representing a brand so I couldn't have said no but boxing really but yes it's pretty large it is very large and a little difficult to navigate it's it it is one of the premier uh arenas in the world and so the fact that you would have to change everything in just a short period of time to have security for our our president is um is a challenge within itself but it did take away from the um not only the enthusiasm but all the things that that you mentioned I I found it um somewhat amusing that people were talking about he is one of the reasons why oh yeah that is funny the the Spurs um won that night there was bad juju in the um in the audience and then the following day people came out with their sage um oh that's hilarious truly and you see this little smoke in there it's what are they what are you all doing? We're trying to get rid of the the scent of whatever was going on and the the energy and the vitality so then the next day when they had the next game and uh you had the energy and the vitality and wow it was back then well the Knicks ended up pulling it off so well um good luck to both teams and that's right continue to play excellent basketball and entertain the masses. Well and I'll be right there tonight. Yes you will rooting on my Spurs.
SPEAKER_03Yeah I'll be at Leela okay um okay so last thing we want to chat about this week is that you popped by a conference that has to do with the overall theme of of this podcast. So we we actually I haven't even gotten a chance to talk to you about it more in depth yet but want to give you the chance to just say a few things about I thought it was a a wonderful opportunity for mothers and daughters to to come together.
SPEAKER_00This was a a mini conference hand um that was planned uh in Cincinnati Ohio okay and the idea was to bring together mothers and daughters between the ages of 12 and 22 actually to to talk about how they are not only responding to the household that may have an absent father okay or to be able to talk about how young people are responding to their mothers in this age of social media, in this age of lack of decorum in this age of challenging relationships back in the day when we were raised we didn't have all of the extra problems that young ladies have today in terms of their relationships with their mothers because the images that you see whether it's on social media or images you see on television or the images that you may see down the street or your neighbors or whatever may not be the appropriate images that your mother or your family would want you to emulate. So that was one of the the topics. The other piece had to do with is your relationship with your mother real from the standpoint that you can tell your mother what you're thinking and your mother can communicate with you a lot of discussion about that's a high bar communication. Well it it is a high bar but if you don't have that really good honest authentic relationship then you don't have your go-to person in the way that you need to so there was a lot of um advice to mothers on how to be able to talk honestly with your daughters okay but there was also a lot of dialogue about young women tell your mothers what you need to know ask your mothers those questions social media is not the place that you well if your mom's not a safe place though then they they encouraged you go to an aunt go to a grandmother we talked about far like the mother figure in your in your sphere that can serve that role and it it's important today because of not only the misinformation that that we are aware of but um it's hard to be unaccepted in your peer group it's hard to change from environment to environment it's hard to go to uh a new school it's always been difficult but because of bullying because of the insecurities that people have because of the economic disparities that that go on today it's even harder to raise children and so there was a real uh embracing of mothers and motherhood as as well. It was for mothers and daughters and so was it mostly mothers or was there a good representation of mothers and daughters well you registered as a mother-daughter team oh okay and so the the um the entire experience had to do with coming in and being it and doing it with your mother or your daughter so uh I went around and just talked to people asking the mothers why they wanted to be there this was the third year that this particular event took place and the mothers wanted to be there because they really wanted some help in being able to strengthen the relationship. Yeah I can see that and then I asked the daughters why they were willing to come their mom dragged them they're holding the cane right now they weren't there voluntarily there they were probably voluntold in some ways but but um there was one mother that I spoke to um actually at length and she had two daughters there one daughter who was uh in her early twenties and one daughter who was a new teenager. Okay. And so both of them said that they liked spending time with their mother. And so I thought that was wonderful. Clearly at that age yes um but also they wanted to um make sure that they were supporting their mother because their mother's a single mother and this program has really been supportive of single mothers. Okay. And they have seen the way that their mother has struggled to be able to bring the life um back that she wants to have for them forward. And so that that was difficult. So it was a a good event with good exchange, good information and it just reminded me how blessed I I am to be able to have a a daughter like you we like each other in loving each other and being able to spend time together. A couple of the presenters were mother and daughter teams um that were similar to us in terms of the way that they kind of go about their life. Okay and they do things together. Yeah not just the normal regular family things but they do other things together. And so it made me feel good about this podcast. It made me feel good about you and our relationship but it also reminded me that this was intentional because when you make your child a priority and they know it and you keep that ongoing relationship it changes over the years too.
SPEAKER_03Yeah I mean that's as I'm listening to you talk I was like well I I am the way I am because of you. And so like shout out to your parenting you know you it it's I didn't parent myself you know then if I had it there'd be other challenges there. And so um I a lot of kudos to um the mothers who were utilizing this opportunity to strengthen their relationship and uh continuing to prioritize their choice in being a mother and all of what that entails and all the sacrifice that that entails.
SPEAKER_00Very much so and I I heard one mother talk about that her daughter says things that she could never say to her mother and and she said when I um she said I'm old school I I grew up when you come into the room and you had to just sit and be seen and not heard. Yeah. And then she she spoke about the the difficulties of being able to communicate with her mother and she said and I didn't want to have that kind of difficulty with my daughter and that is why I'm here and I said I appreciated your remarks because my mother was old school we've talked about that we have talked about that and I said and it was meaningful and and then I remembered a moment listening to one young lady that um we had where there was uh a a a friend and someone we love and care about that was having some some challenges and um the mother was talking to me and the daughter was kind of talking to you and years later when we were talking about this situation you and I um I said you know what I would have done and you said I I don't know I said um that's when I would have said to your father I'm going I'm gonna go pick you up I'm going to move you back I'm going to lock you up until sanity comes back until sanity comes back um because sometimes there needs to be some extreme measures taken when you see when they're young yeah and you see a loved one who uh who is your responsibility because at that point you would have still been um our responsibility so I would have had an insane moment but that's just the way I was well yeah I feel like you you do that while you can because to your point you hit 18 and up 18 plus it's it's out of your control.
SPEAKER_03It's out of your control.
SPEAKER_00So yes but it was great. So thank you for answering me about that. So thank you for going as we are raised by her mom we uh shout out to you. I know that you were not no nonsense Rosa that's what I was telling people today that I was raised by a no nonsense mother and I try my best to uh to make sure that some of those values and principles instilled in you.
SPEAKER_03Awesome well thank you all so much for watching and listening this week we always appreciate you and please continue to like subscribe love yes and comment and engage with us just like you are here on the couch with us and we will see you next week bye bye she's got wisdom she's got deck she's got questions she's got that wisdom that's the key of the mother
